Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Unrealistic Expectations

A lady saw that I was wearing a wedding ring last week and asked "Is it all it's cracked up to be?". Another lady, maybe a day later asked me if I was enjoying the married life. After I told her it was fine, she looked at me in shock and said "Really?!". WTF?!

Who are the people "cracking marriage up to be something"? I think that's the problem a lot of ppl have. They seem to think that once you get married, every problem you ever had disappears. That's not true. I don' t understand that thought process. I didn't have any miraculous expectations when I got married. I don't believe in fairytale shit. I believe that people are people and none of us are perfect. I didn't expect my "frog" to turn into some "prince" after the exchange of vows. I understood that if he was a frog before the wedding, he'll be a frog afterwards. Although I wouldn't actually compare my hubby to a frog, I'm just saying. The imperfections that my hubby had prior to the wedding only shined more after the wedding. As I'm sure mine are shining bright as I type. He's known I wasn't domestic since about the first week or so after meeting me. Now he really notices that shit. So. Oh well. I am who I am....as he is who he is.

Honestly, as far as expectations go, I only had a few going into this. And I feel like the same things were expected of me. When you're not married and you have friends that are, you probably see a lot of issues and drama in the marriages. And chances are those couples were having issues before they got married. Looking at other people's situations, I can see how being married could look like a bad thing to some. Especially if you have a lot of friends that have been married and are now divorced. But you can't base your decision to marry on other people's relationships. You have to know who it is you are thinking of spending the rest of your life with. YOU do. And you can't make that decision looking at the next person. If you don't expect your frog to turn into a prince after you say "I do", then you should be fine. If your frog was already a prince when you met him, then I would imagine that he would remain a prince. Although you do have those instances where people go backwards....

I don't know.....I just wish people would be real. Like really real. Shit don't change. If it's good, it should only get better. If it's bad, it will definitely get worse.....let's be real ppl.