Usher Flop

Okay, I like Usher....kind of. I really liked him in the confessions bit. Out of curiousity, I searched record sales on his most recent album. According to the information I found, this cd hasn't even gone gold yet. How does one go from selling millions of albums, to not even selling half a million. Talk about a HUGE flop. How shameful is that. And no, I haven't purchased the album. For whatever reason, it hasn't been on my list of things to buy, as Beyonce's album hasn't made the list either.

But back to Usher...surely I'm not the only person thinking that his new "family man" image hasn't sat well with the public. The thing he had going with the confessions album is the fact that he and Chilli had just broken up. Not to mention the shit was just bangin. But why is it people aren't interested in the happy, family man he's become? Hell, I don't know. I should be asking myself that....

Goals...

I have them. I don't want to find myself thirty something, fucked up, and with no direction. And honestly, the likelihood of that happening is pretty much nonexistent. I like to do short and longterm goals....

I have figured out that with the help of my brain..and a calculator, I can be almost debt free in the next 14 months. And that's atleast 10k in debt I'm looking to pay off. I just recently applied for a part time job in order to speed up the process.

So that's goal number 1: Pay off my debt, with the exception of the townhouse.
Goal #2: Save 15-20k over the 2 years following my debt payoff.
And shit, if I can save that much money, I'm sure I won't stop. I have to make sure I have money in my pocket, money in my bank acct., and money in my baby's bank acct. Not to mention I plan on sending the little one to private school. That shit is high. But I'm preparing for it.....I can't wait!

Unrealistic Expectations

A lady saw that I was wearing a wedding ring last week and asked "Is it all it's cracked up to be?". Another lady, maybe a day later asked me if I was enjoying the married life. After I told her it was fine, she looked at me in shock and said "Really?!". WTF?!

Who are the people "cracking marriage up to be something"? I think that's the problem a lot of ppl have. They seem to think that once you get married, every problem you ever had disappears. That's not true. I don' t understand that thought process. I didn't have any miraculous expectations when I got married. I don't believe in fairytale shit. I believe that people are people and none of us are perfect. I didn't expect my "frog" to turn into some "prince" after the exchange of vows. I understood that if he was a frog before the wedding, he'll be a frog afterwards. Although I wouldn't actually compare my hubby to a frog, I'm just saying. The imperfections that my hubby had prior to the wedding only shined more after the wedding. As I'm sure mine are shining bright as I type. He's known I wasn't domestic since about the first week or so after meeting me. Now he really notices that shit. So. Oh well. I am who I am....as he is who he is.

Honestly, as far as expectations go, I only had a few going into this. And I feel like the same things were expected of me. When you're not married and you have friends that are, you probably see a lot of issues and drama in the marriages. And chances are those couples were having issues before they got married. Looking at other people's situations, I can see how being married could look like a bad thing to some. Especially if you have a lot of friends that have been married and are now divorced. But you can't base your decision to marry on other people's relationships. You have to know who it is you are thinking of spending the rest of your life with. YOU do. And you can't make that decision looking at the next person. If you don't expect your frog to turn into a prince after you say "I do", then you should be fine. If your frog was already a prince when you met him, then I would imagine that he would remain a prince. Although you do have those instances where people go backwards....

I don't know.....I just wish people would be real. Like really real. Shit don't change. If it's good, it should only get better. If it's bad, it will definitely get worse.....let's be real ppl.

Runner Up

was just not my thing. It's funny because it is indeed true that once you have a "husband" of your own, it's a whole different ball game....

This subject comes up again tonight because there is a young lady that I know who is okay with her position in second place. She's been with this guy, on and off, for about 4 years. He has been with his girl (who is possibly his wife indeed) for well over a decade. I think at one point in their "relationship", she felt bad, but now, not so much.

I had a conversation with her not long ago about this situation. And keep in mind, it was a very brief conversation. But she was out one day, and ended up in the same place as her guy's girl. As a matter of fact, she's bumped into this young lady on several occasions. Now, you would think that anyone with a heart, or even half a conscience, would feel bad...you know, somewhat remorseful about looking into a woman's face, knowing good and hell well they are sleeping with that person's significant other....but, no. Not her. She said she didn't feel bad. Instead of looking at this chick and being convicted, she looked at her, and started to size her up. Now this is one thing I don't understand about "the woman on the side". These pitiful ass women will size up the main girl, compare, contrast....all that shit, as if it matters. The bottom line of the whole situation is they are sleeping with a dude that probably has no intentions of leaving his girl for them. Who gives a fuck if your body is better, her ass is flat, she works at fucking McDonalds? Who cares?! The dude is okay with all the flaws that you bitches point out. So stop it. Just stop!

Excuse me, I had a moment. Anyway, this broad had the nerve to tell me that this guy is not allowed to be with anyone except her and his girlfriend. Seriously? Wow. I just don't see how someone can be happy in that position. And it's crazy because I just found out a little earlier that the "main girl" hired a private investigator months ago to follow her no good ass man. Not only that, but she has all the evidence and shit she needs to fuck the other chick up. Which she's already begun to do. First on her list of things to do, call this chick's "boyfriend" to tell him to tell his girl to stop calling her "husband". She says they've been married for 3 years....ol' girl wasn't aware of a wedding taking place during her years of being 2nd place....I would imagine that a wedding pretty much disqualifies her.....

Fuck it. I'm rambling....I think I got my point across though. Lol.

Right Now

as I type, I think the hardest thing for me is to be quiet. I don't know why folks are testing me, but for some reason it's getting it hard. Bite my tongue? Shit, the muthafucka is almost gone. I don't know what I'm going to do when there's no more tongue left to bite. I'm scared I'm going to resort to biting somebody. And it will probably be the person who's pissing me off. For real.

This Dude

not B. Scott, but the other dude, Marcus Patrick.....

Okay, I find B. Scott to be a "pretty" boy. And I could see how sometimes he could fool a man, but.....this Marcus dude is aware that B. Scott has peen and balls. Now I thought for sure that it was said that Marcus Patrick was a heterosexual. Not that it matters to me that much, but....after seeing him and B. Scott dance on each other seductively as they did, I'm pretty sure there are more than "heterosexual" bones in Marcus's body....

I don't know any straight men that would interact with a gay man in this way. But then again, I don't know every straight man in the world either.....

Whatever. My gaydar screeched so loud when I saw Marcus in this video that it made my head hurt.

I'm Not Depressed

I just feel strange right now. Maybe it's because it's gloomy outside. Or maybe it's because I'm sitting at my desk listening to music that has my mind racing ninety to nothing.....

I don't know.....

On another note, Brandy's cd is jammin. Why are ppl sleeping on this? I can't even pick a true favorite b/c so many of these songs are hott!! I think the one I repeat the most is Piano Man....it's the hotness!

Lessons on Love 101: Follow Your Mind

Remember that old saying "follow your heart"? Well, don't.

That's bullshit. Following your heart will have you doing some crazy shit. Your heart doesn't have a brain, which means if you're following your heart, you're doing so without logic. No rationale.

How many women have stayed in abusive relationships because they were following their dumb ass heart. Or stayed with cheating boyfriends? Again. Following the heart.

Leave that emotional shit out of decisions. That would be my advice to anyone. Following your heart will have you okay with being a side piece of ass...ah hem....

It's never okay to follow your heart. Never. You'll end up fucked up everytime. Now a combination of heart and mind, with mind leading first? Perfectly fine. It's that heart solo that will get you every time.

At What Point

do my opinions become judgement? I'd like to consider myself a nonjudgemental person, but I do believe there's a fine line. Let me check out the free dictionary's definitions....

Okay, so turns out they are pretty much one in the same, with an opinion lacking proof. So maybe I am judgemental after all. But does that mean I'm not allowed to have an opinion about something? That's bullshit.

I understand that ppl are different. We don't all walk the same walk. Now if I tell somebody they need to walk like me because they are walking wrong, then I consider that being judgemental. However, if I just don't like the way someone walks, then I just don't like it. My opinion.

Anywhoo. I don't know...........

Come Out, Come Out...Wherever You Are.....

I'm nosey. Naturally. I can't help it. Even when I know things aren't my business, sometimes I just feel like I have to know.

For the past several years, I've had my suspicions about you and your "best friend". I've watched you guys interact, and that shit just looks flirty to me. I've never seen real men behave the way you all do. Yea, I know you got "hos" all over the place, but that doesn't change my thought process.

Y'all roommies and shit? Yea, I'm sure that's all it is. Lol. Even Ray damn Charles can see that y'all are a couple. And what do you do to confirm my suspicions? You put some bullshit on your facebook about you being in an open relationship with this dude? Men don't play like that. Are you trying to ease your way out of the closet?

I honestly don't care what your preference is. I'll love you regardless, but. Yes, there's a "but". I think it would be much better for the ladies in your life to know the ways you swing. If you'd just be honest, you may be surprised at the ones that won't stop fucking with you. Sometimes ppl just need to know.

They have a right to know if you shit packing on the side. It's not fair for you to put them in that situation without giving them an option. You need to be honest with yourself. And quit thinking you're fooling ppl. The whole damn family knows your ass is funny. You seem to be the only one that doesn't. It's okay. Come out. We're going to love you regardless.

Hey Neffe,

It's me again girl. How's it going?!? Well, you know what today is right? It's Tuesday. I just saw you on television promoting your new book. Ah hem...can't wait to read it Neffe. Can't wait.

I don't even have the energy to question you or Frankie with your get rich quick schemes. You looked cute Neffe. I still can't for the life of me figure out what's going on with your lip. Even shiny and glossed up, that one side still hung lower. Such as life huh?

I know your sister's cd was released today. I meant to go to Best Buy and get it, but I didn't have a chance to. I'm sure it's nice. Despite what you think, I'm a fan (of hers, not yours...or Frankie's). But there is still a small part of me that's hesitant in purchasing the cd because I'm afraid that you're going to make a surprise appearance. I'm not ready for that. Sorry. I'm just not.

Oh, and I see you have a new boyfriend. Soullow? Now what the hell does he do? I'm sure he's plotting his "make money from being associated with someone who's associated with Ms. Cole" scheme as we speak....nonetheless, I'm happy for you. And I hope someone buys your book dear.

Smooches.