Relationship Ramble

Is it possible to be so used to negative things coming out of certain situations, that you don't know how to accept happiness when it finally comes your way?

The past 6 months (in my newfound relationship) have been great. Not perfect, but really good. And at times, I find myself waiting on the catch, the gotcha gotcha (as Laurieann would say). Still, no dice...I've been more places, planned more things, had more conversations than I could have ever thought possible....

I hesitate sharing my true feelings with people for a few reasons....reason numero 1) Not everyone believes in good relationships. 2) I'd rather keep the people out of my business...and 3) maybe it's because I'm not sure if I believe it myself....

I have decided (as hard as it may be) to take things a day at a time. I'm actually okay with knowing that it's indeed possible for me to truly care about someone again. I haven't been this way in close to 10 years....nope, not even my ex husband got this kind of attention from me. And that's mainly because somewhere deep down, I knew I had no business with him to begin with.

I find myself having the conversations with my new guy that I should have had with the ex...way before we got married...or in bed together for that matter. We are having the hard conversations now...and I mean hard! The kind of "hard" that can make you wonder if you'll be together once they are over. And I truly mean "conversations". No arguing, or screaming, or fighting...but the things we talk about are those things that could lead to all of those if you don't have an understanding...so I'm thankful for those.

I'm rambling...and I'm aware...so bear with me. Oh, I'm funny to myself. We have also been doing these little evaluations (my idea). I never came up with a steady interval for us to evaluate our relationship, but I think the last evaluation was at the 6 month mark. All was well...so I was told. I'm making every effort possible for us to keep an open line of communication...since I know how important that is....

I dunno...I'm tired of rambling b/c my head is starting to hurt..and I'm sure that's largely based on the fact that I have my hair pulled back in a"ducktail" and it's way too tight!! I'll be back later.

Celibacy #FAIL

Well.....that was fun while it lasted!! A whole "almost" 3 months of celibacy!! Wow...so far, I can't think of anything I've been able to hold out on.....shopping? I tell myself it's a sale, so it's not that bad....junk food? I tell myself "it's only one", so I eat it anyway....sex? The devil made me do it.

So much for that! As far as the new beau, we're still going strong...we haven't had any major pow wows...he still seems to be the person I think he is....so we'll see...

I think I'll have a few things to post in the next couple of days....I don't want to bundle it all up in one random post...